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July 2009 
Screaming
Posted on Dec 26th, 2008
by 
Spiritual Liberation
Spiritual Liberation
I woke up this morning screaming. I had a bad dream.
To make a long story short, in my dream one of my children was kidnapped and the other two of them joined a cult and were brainwashed. My van and cell phone were stolen, and the police were no help, though they tried. I didn't have anyone to turn to.
I was alone. Stripped of everything that mattered. Letting go of what was never mine to begin with, but not by choice.
When my youngest turned his back on me in the dream, I threw myself on the ground like a little child, arms wide open as if hugging the sky, and I screamed. I didn't know what else to do so I just let my pain come out my mouth.
I felt utterly alone.
It seems so symbolic.
To make a long story short, in my dream one of my children was kidnapped and the other two of them joined a cult and were brainwashed. My van and cell phone were stolen, and the police were no help, though they tried. I didn't have anyone to turn to.
I was alone. Stripped of everything that mattered. Letting go of what was never mine to begin with, but not by choice.
When my youngest turned his back on me in the dream, I threw myself on the ground like a little child, arms wide open as if hugging the sky, and I screamed. I didn't know what else to do so I just let my pain come out my mouth.
I felt utterly alone.
It seems so symbolic.
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Love you!
I’ve been having similar dreams this week.
Guess it’s time to let go of all the things I thought I had some right to hold onto.
We can say all day we know who we are and that we’re all connected “all one soul” but when the physical connection is severed we realize just how much we think we know and how little we have learned.
Not even death can separate us.
But it sure hurts.
That separation is scary to the physical mind.
If we could only remember we are also spiritual beings, that we are all connected, all one. I am you and you are me.
But we can read, study, think all day but until we experience it we just can’t seem to get it. Guess that’s why we are here. To Experience it.
To gain understanding of the knowledge we have.
Hugs!
Wow…what a powerful dream! What emotion and release.
Loving you.
Dana
Shani, what do you think it is symbolic of?
Love you my friend. xx
It’s symbolic of the whole “letting go of what I’m not” I’ve been facing. I am not the mother of my children (I mean I am, but I’m not…I gave birth to them, but they do not belong to me). Mother is a role. Wife is a role. Human is a role.
It’s been a little more challenging as of late, this letting go.
Oh I can understand that. I thought oh I’m not going to have that empty nest syndrom. No I’m special. I got it together. may in some other life.
You miss them, you love them. Christmas and no little one to surprise.
We were just at store saying we miss Michael being young and going with us.
He always wanted a quarter when we left the store to get something out of
those machines. It’s those little things that bring it back. Then for a while
it’s ok and I’m so glad to have the peace and quite and to be free to do things.
Then up will pop another little something to remind me how sweet having
them in your life is and what an honor to have been able to share that time
with them was.
Life is good. Never boring.
Thank you Shani. Sometimes I see your sharing like an onion, layers that peel away. To be truthful I am not certain I have seen the core of you yetbut I do feel this often… one day you may come back to your blogs and writings, read them from outside of yourself and so much would be revealed.
Always here, always your friend in unconditional love. Have a blessed New Year. xxx